


I've Never Felt...

by IfISing



Category: Spring Awakening
Genre: Drugs, Gay, Help, M/M, Sex, Support
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-17
Updated: 2016-01-17
Packaged: 2018-05-14 12:15:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 787
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5743501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IfISing/pseuds/IfISing
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hernst Smut/ HC Hanschen and Ernst are both addicts. I don't own them, but I love them very much.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I've Never Felt...

I opened the door, only to see that the meeting had already started. I shouldn't have come. Wait that blonde boy's about to speak. Maybe I should stay...

He begins:

"My name is Hänschen and I am an addict.

I fell in love with drugs because I fell out of love with myself. I ended up getting myself into plenty of trouble.

I was a pack a day smoker coughing up black.  
I had sex with my boss for drugs and 500 dollars.  
I ended up high on coke shaking out in the street shirtless at 5 AM.   
I drank so badly that once I ended up tied up on the floor not knowing where I was with some kinky creep. We didn't have sex. He just watched me squirm on the ground covered in rope.   
After that, I ran in the rain all the way home and promised myself I would be clean.   
Then I relapsed.  
Cocaine is too strong.   
The guys and girls I'm around encourage me and when I am all alone and I come down I feel like I'm going to bleed everywhere.  
I knew I was going to die if I kept it up and I joined NA. This is my 3 month meeting."

I was shocked. He was so cute. But he was so fucked up.

I was forced to come here by my mother, and he chose to come. I was taking my little brother's ADHD meds and had trouble stopping, but this guy really needed to be here. I'm so spoiled... And did he say he likes boys, too?

I head up to him after the meeting.

"Um, Hanschen?"  
"Yeah?"  
"It's nice to meet you, I'm Ernst."  
"First time?"  
"What?"

Holy crap what? Can he tell I'm a virgin?

"First meeting with NA?"  
"Oh. Yeah."  
"Well, you're making a very good choice."   
"My mother made me come."

Oh my gosh shut up Ernst do you want to turn 18 without having ever gotten laid?

I start to cry. He runs his fingers through my hair, pulls me close and kisses me. The first time in days I haven't felt empty.

I ask him if we can go somewhere more private. He takes me back to his place. I don't ask my mom. Screw her.

Within moments, my fly is open, and Hänschen is sucking me off. Why is he so good? Oral fixation from smoking, maybe? Oh, he found my sensitive spot with his hand. Right side, stomach. He's holding onto it for stability, massaging it gently. I stop him because as amazing as it feels, I have other things on the brain.

"Hänschen?" I squeak out.  
"Yes?"  
"I was wondering if we could..."  
"You want to fill the void with me?"  
"Yes."  
"All right, let me go get a condom. It's not a bad idea to avoid relapse when you're starting out."  
"At first... I thought we'd only talk?"  
"We can talk, too. Whatever you feel like doing."

I stare down. My dick is making this choice for me. I'm still horny.

"I feel like having sex with you right now is the only thing that will make me feel any better."  
"Then in the meantime, why not?"

I bend over, assuming that this is how it works from countless years of porn.

"What are you doing, Ernst?"  
"I thought-"  
"I want to see your face. To be able to kiss you. Hold you tight. Face me."  
"Then how?"  
"I'll show you."

He lifts up my legs in a way reminiscent of gym class. He puts some lube on one finger and I feel cold for a moment before he starts to really work inside me. He puts one more in, and then he looks at me, and asks,

"Are you ready, Ernst?"  
"Yes."

He puts his dick inside me nice and easy. He doesn't go too hard at first. When he does, it hurts a bit. I wince. He kisses my neck, and then my lips. Suddenly, the pain stops, and we've reached a place where nothing else matters. He's brushing up against me, filling me, and I'm so close. I want to feel high again. I want to feel-  
OH.

He thrusts deep into a place I never knew existed and I feel dizzy. I'm lucky to be lying down. Wow. I can't stop moaning. I never felt like this on my own. It's all rushing through me. I can feel again. And I realize that by the time I snap out of it, we're not even fucking anymore. He's just holding me close to him and I still feel something. Something better than pills. 

"Oh, G-d, Hänschen."  
"Mmm. I know."  
"I can finally feel again."


End file.
